*Damon, ?- Work Crush
Pros:
Handsome
Gentleman
Knows how to work 👀
Sweet
Funny
Great attitude
Amazing style
Slow burn was hot
Cons:
Bad follow through
Ghost-y
Oblivious
Gossip Girl here-
And boy do I have a story for you.
Rumor has it there’s been an office hook up.
First, let’s say hello to the former colleagues who found out about this blog through their burner instagram accounts.
Hello stalkers.
Thanks for the page views, babes.
Now I’m sure you’re dyingggg to know who I hooked up with. Who’s the lucky guy??
Was it the silver fox in the C-suite, the 30-something frat bro energy trader, the quiet wholesome guy in accounting?
Wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy?
Well, I could tell you- but that wouldn’t be any fun.
If I made it that easy, what would you talk about in your sad break room over watered down espressos from a vending machine?
Put on your detective hat, Sherlock. You’ve got a mystery to solve.
Let’s start from the beginning.
I came across Damon within the first week I started working in February. He was charming, handsome, had great style, but kept to himself. I immediately noticed him and texted my friends.
Me: F*ck there’s a really cute guy at work 🫠 (melting face emoji)
Serena: Did you talk to him?
Me: Obviously no!! Tried not to even make eye contact. But he def saw me. I’m having lunch
Blair: whooooo… send pics
Me: I can’t!! Wtf lol. Anyway he’s outside smoking. He’s too far for a creeper pic
HA- your first clue. He smokes.
But wait- everyone in europe smokes. That didn’t help narrow him down at all.
Blair: describe himmm. Our age or your usual old type lol
Me: [Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted]
Serena: Are you gonna talk to him
Me: No are you crazy!? I can’t be the office whore as soon as I get here 😂😂 Also if he wants he can talk to me.
Blair: fair
Serena: Bro who cares, just do it in secret 👅
Me: Lolll you’re crazy. This is just gonna be my work crush. It ain’t ever happening. Maybe I’ll have like a two year plan ahahah. A slow burn
Blair: you know you’re gonna get him
Me: NO. at least not yet
I mean is it so wrong to have a work crush?? Can two attractive people help it? Or one regular person and one gorgeous specimen??
I mean, I think that having a work crush is totally fine and normal, and if anything, encouraged!
(*unless you’re taken/married- then do not have a work crush pls.
It’s only fun and innocent if you’re single.)
To quote thee queen of dating herself, Amelia Dimoldenberg:
“Well, I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing, because life without a crush is incredibly boring. So I do think that we need a crush at all times in order to, like, wake up in the morning. [lol]
I also think having a crush at work means that you're probably more likely to go to work, so that's also probably a good thing. And then, you know, if you're in the office and there's someone catching your eye, then yeah, I think it'll make you enjoy your job more.”
Thank you for your service Ms. Dimoldenberg. For speaking what is in the hearts of single girls worldwide.
Anyway, I was not going to pursue this work crush bc… he should pursue me! I mean… the slow burn is what makes it fun anyway.
Over the next few weeks I kept running into him. Figuratively and… literally. At the Cafe near the office, walking past him outside the building while he smoked, and the one time I was walking down a narrow hallway and was turned around saying bye to someone behind me when I walked right into his chest.
I guess he was turning a corner and not really looking where he was going either. And for anyone wondering, I was wearing my classic mini skirt, button down and high heel combo. I was strutting down that hallway like Naomi Campbell but shorter and less skinny.
Bam
(Two hot people collide.)
Ahhh, I love when the universe indulges me.
Me: Sorry
Damon: Scusa, are you okay?
Me: yeah, sorry my fault
Damon: No, no, it was me.
After 2 seconds that felt like 2 minutes of sultry eye contact, I smiled, looked down and walked away. Was I pretending to be coy??? I don’t know, maybe in the moment I was actually a little embarrassed and caught off guard.
Anyway, sometimes there would be days I didn’t see him. Sometimes weeks. But then ever so randomly, we would meet. I’d be waiting for an elevator and the doors would open and it would be him, standing there alone.
I smiled and got in, and he finally talked to me. I guess all I had to do was corner him in an elevator earlier (kidding).
Damon: You’re new here right?
Me: Yeah!
Damon: I’ve… seen you having lunch. I’m Damon.
Me: Nayomi. Nice to meet you.
We shook hands
Me: And I’ve seen you outside smoking! I guess I know who to go to if I ever need a cigarette.
Damon: (laughing) Of course, you can always ask.
Damon: How do you like Lugano?
Me: I love it! But I’ve lived here for a few years before so I already know it. I have my friends here and everything.
Damon: Oh that’s good. How’s your Italian?
Me: Bad (laughing). I can understand a lot and can speak enough to survive. But pls don’t put me on the spot
Damon: (laughing) I won’t don’t worry. Well if you need anything, let me know…
Me: I will… thanks
He soft smiled and got out of the elevator.
I smiled, winked and waved.
WINKED??? Winked???? Why did I wink???? I mean… it was like a cute wink and not a predatory wink but… I feel like high school cheerleading permanently altered my winking reflexes.
Anyway, okay, now we’ve spoken. This is fabulous for my crush lore.
I was super excited about this and generally kept my work crushes to myself to avoid work gossip, but I was very close with my colleague that I shared an office with. We had a very brother/sister dynamic and I would pry into his love life and he would pry into mine. I told him about my elevator encounter and wanted to know if he knew anything about Damon. Again- nothing was ever gonna happen. But what else was I gonna think about during my work day?
Me: tell me everything you know about Damon.
Ben: Why
Me: Just tell meee
Ben: You have a crushhh??
Me: He’s cute, maybe. I just wanna know. What’s his deal?
Ben: [Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted Retracted]
Me: Interesting
Ben: Want me to set you up or something? Cuz I’m not gonna
Me: I didn’t ask you to freak! I was just curious
For the next few months we saw each other in passing, smiled, waved. It was very cordial. We didn’t really talk much, just a bit here and there.
Come spring I was having a hard period with work. I was working insane hours, weekends, dealing with difficult people, really trying my damn hardest to keep it together. I went down to the break room to grab a snack, and in there, I saw, Damon. He was sitting there talking with a colleague. I smiled at him and put in my little coins in the machine. I wasn’t really in a talking mood. I didn’t expect to see him in there, he never really goes there. As I was leaving, I guess him and his friend were leaving too.
Damon: Hey Nayomi. How are you?
Me: Eh, rough day. It’s fine.
Damon: I’m sorry, it’s almost over
Me: Yeah, thank God. Actually… think I could have a cigarette?
His friend looked at him so pleased.
Damon: Of course, yeah, yes.. here.
He opened his pack and turned it toward me.
Damon: Do you need a lighter?
Me: Yeah I think I have one upstairs
Damon: Here take mine
Me: No, no worries really. I have one.
Damon: It’s okay. This way you don’t have to go back upstairs.
I smiled at him, he was being so cute.
Me: Thanks, I’ll… give it back to you
Damon: Figurati (Italain for “forget about it”)
Me: Thanks…
Damon: Next time you need to take break, let me know
Me: Sure
Ofc I filled in my work bestie Ben in as soon as I got back into the office.
Ben: You guys…
Me: Nothing’s gonna happen, it’s just fun. But how cute was that?
This was on a Thursday, and Thursday is the night people go out in Lugano. Everyone goes for post work drinks.
Friday morning when I walked into my office, Ben was giving me the most smug look.
Ben: You won’t believe who I saw last night.
Me: Who
Ben: Guess
Me: Whooo
Ben: Your best friend
Me: Who’s my best friend?
Ben: You’re special friend
Me: … Damon? Where? omg
Ben: Shaker…
I didn’t even know he went there.
Yeah he saw me and was like, “Hey, I haven't seen you in so long. Can I get you a beer?” And he was asking me all these questions about my old department and I was like… I changed departments like 2 years ago everyone knows that. And then he was like “Oh you’re working with Nayomi now right?” And asking me if you’re single and all this stuff.
Me: AHHHH
Ben: Oh my God I shouldn’t have told you, I knew you were gonna be weird about it.
Me: I’m not being weird about it but helloooo this is kind of exciting!!
Okay confirmed, he’s interested. Hmm.. maybe I should ask him for a cig or something. I mean if there wasn’t a reason to see each other, I’d never see him besides the few times it was just absolutely random and by chance. And as Amelia said, life without a crush is incredibly boring, and I needed some excitement. It was almost summer and it was time to crank up the heat with this crush. But not right away bc that would seem desperate and too obvious that I knew he just talked about me. I decided to wait until the next time someone royally pissed me off and I wanted to have a cigarette. As a person who’s happy most of the time, it’s rare, but when you work with crazy people, it happens more frequently.
And one day, in early June, I was fuming. I had steam coming out of my ears.
I had to go outside and get some fresh air. Take some deep breaths. But why breathe in fresh air when I could get a head rush and inhale poison.
(this is me making fun of myself for having the occasional cigarette. Again, I don’t condone it).
I messaged Damon.
Me: Hey, you free for a cigarette break?
Damon: Yes, I was just about to take one anyway. Give me 5 mins and I’ll meet you outside
I don’t know what was hotter- the weather or me in my gold Roberto Cavalli high heels.
He greeted me with the usual three kisses on the cheek, Swiss style.
Damon: Ciao Nayomi. Looking great
Me: Thank you. Not too bad yourself!
Guys, he has insanee style. He really always looks so good and chic, without trying to hard. It’s giving effortless old money in south of France.
We had a little chat, how I’m liking working there, I asked about his experience, how long he’s been at the company, bla bla. Boring stuff- and we quickly moved on to summer plans, travels and what we like to do. He doesn’t live in Lugano so it’s rare that he goes out here.
Me: That’s probably why I never see you outside of work
Damon: Yeah, I feel too old to be out too much anyway.
Hmm… is he actually older or is this a common feeling for people in their 30’s anyway? Another useless clue I guess.
Anyway, we had a really nice, effortless conversation. He offered to help me in any way he could with work. He was kind, supportive, humble, and very tender.
Well, we couldn’t talk for too long since we were only allowed 15 minutes of sunlight in the prison yard outside of the office before you have to clock back in. Well, it didn’t matter as much for him since he had seniority over me, but I had people micro managing my every step, so I had to be more careful about everything.
Men- innocent until proven innocent
Women- Guilty until proven innocent and even then you’re still guilty.
(F U patriarchy!!! I will crush you one mini skirt and high heel combo at a time!!!!!!!!)
Anyway, like I said, It was a great convo.
Damon: This was fun, we should get a coffee or something sometime
Internally: (wooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!)
Externally: very cool and composed
Me: Yeah, Definitely! Message me
Damon: I’m leaving for vacation soon so I’m pretty slammed these days, I’ll let you know when I’m back
I was really looking forward to him coming back. He was actually so sweet. And even if I was chatting other guys on the apps, nothing can really compare to the real life chemistry of someone you know in person.
Three weeks later (Yeah, Europeans get crazy long vacations lol), he messaged me.
Damon: Hey how are you? I’m back from my trip
Me: Welcome back! How was it?
He filled me in a bit but said he would tell me more over coffee.
OMG. Is he asking me out?? Okay maybe it’s not like a real official date, fine, I know that, but he is making a little plan to see me?? Is my work crush gonna be a real crush?? Also I feel like coffee is perfectly work appropriate but I wouldn’t really love a coffee date in any other circumstance.
Damon: How’s tomorrow afternoon?
Me: Perfect
Now maybe I’m wrong… or maybe—as Scott Disick once said—“I’m probably just perfect and it’s everybody else around me that’s got issues.”
But if someone says something to me, I believe them. Is that naive? Stupid??
Because in my little head, I thought we were actually getting coffee the next day. So obviously, I had to get my nails done during lunch- couldn’t have him clocking my chipped mani when I wrapped my fingers around one of those teeny-tiny espresso cups. Woke up extra early for a blowout, rearranged my whole day… all for a maybe-date with my work crush.
So tell me why, after all that effort—
He didn’t message me.
Ummmm………..
what the f*ck.
Okay.
My crush?
Crushed.
Over. Done. Finito.
Well that was fun while it lasted… disappointing ending though.
I didn’t hear from him for like just short of a month after that. Yeah I was shocked by the audacity to ghost me and a bit upset for a few days, but one thing about me- I’m gonna get over it. (I’m not but I like to pretend). Hope you enjoyed your 15 minutes of fame in my head. NEXT. Now you’re a washed up old celebrity that no one cares about!!! How you like them apples???
Wow this pure unfiltered inner monologue commentary. Maybe I should keep some of this to myself.
Anyway, you know how this goes….
He eventually came back.
Damon: Hey, sorry things have been pretty hectic since I got back. Are you free for a coffee this week?
……………………………………………………………………………
Hmm… I could either ghost, decline or, just call him out and still go. Those were my options. And I still really wanted to get that coffee………
Me: Maybe, you gonna ghost me again?
Damon: What do you mean?
Serious question- why do men ghost you and then insist that they didn’t ghost you? Like not only are you a ghost, you’re a gaslighting ghost and that’s even worse!
Me: Well I thought we were getting coffee three weeks ago 😂
Damon: Oh, I’m so sorry. I’ve had a lot come up with work and some things in my private life. I’m really sorry, I won’t do that again. Are you free this week or next?
Me: Okay well if you want, you can text me and if I’m free I’ll join you ☺️
I wasn’t gonna make the same mistake twice and plan my day around meeting up with him. If I had a good moment and a natural break in my work day, I’d meet him, if not, well, he missed the boat.
Two days later he texted me in the morning.
Damon: Buongiorno! Would you want to get a coffee around 10/10:30?
Me: Hey my morning is kind of full, afternoon works a bit better for me!
My morning was… normal. Like, regular-level busy. I could have def taken a quick 15 min break but… I am really an innocent wholesome girly that gets excited over crushes, a romantic, a certified lover girl, but if you disappoint me once…. my guard majorly goes up. I will just never be as available as I initially was.
(Will I ever meet a guy that doesn’t disappoint me? Protects that soft side of me and let’s me be a lover girl without getting burned and regretting it?)
Whatever- back to the story. In the afternoon, he sent me another message.
Damon: Hi Nayomi, 3:30 okay for you?
Me: Should be!
At 3, he sent a follow up.
Damon: How’s your day going? Think you can take a break soon?
Me: Yeah, I’m almost at a good stopping point. 3:30 should be good.
We met outside the building at 3:30 and I asked if we could go somewhere that wasn’t right next to the office. I told him that he’s for the most part immune to workplace gossip, or worst case would be praised, but I didn’t want people gossiping about who I was getting coffee with. I had already heard crazy things just because a colleague saw me sitting alone at lunch and offered to join me. It was so sexist and toxic and a lot of shit that wouldn’t fly at an American company.
So to my stalkers, fans, and former colleagues, if you saw me getting coffee with someone- congrats on the sighting, but don’t get too confident.
The coffee was lovely, and I truly had forgiven him for not texting me the last time we had plans. Truth is, we never really know what’s going on in people’s lives and while, yes, it’s important to respect everyone’s time, and also I think, follow through when you say you’re gonna do something, it’s also important to have some grace and know that things come up, life will throw people curveballs and a healthy amount of understanding is good to have. Out of respect and also in order to keep him anonymous, I can’t give any more details, but he was very honest, very sorry, and very sweet. Crush restored!
I still wasn’t seeing him all the time by any means, this was a slow burn work crush remember! It’s not like we were really dating irl. Actually, we were still treading pretty carefully in the “we’re friendssss?? but kind of attracted to each other???” grey area.
Later in the summer a bunch of coworkers were going for a happy hour (apero). We were both invited and I was happy he was gonna be there. It was a fun group, a mix of younger and older collegues. We sat next to each other and were having our own side bar the whole night. We were in our own little world, talking about who knows what. At one point, one colleague was asking about my new role, how it was going etc. He said his only advice for me would be to be meaner.
“Nayomi, you have to sometimes be meaner, less friendly, less… American. You don’t always have to be so nice.”
Me: You think I do everything I do, because I’m scared to me mean?? I do it because I get paid to do it. It’s my job. And if I have to do it anyway, I might as well do it with a smile on my face. It’s just how I am!
Since Damon was sitting right next to me, he jumped in.
Damon: You think Nayomi is too nice? Her??
Damon: You don’t have to protect her, trust me. Nayomi is cut throat, she will claw her way to the top. She’ll do whatever she has to do… it’s not because she can’t be mean.
He shook his head and puffed on his cigarette.
Damon: I know because I was the same way. I could see it from the moment I met her.
………………………………………………………
Every feline instinct in my body wanted to jump him. I had to chill because my inhibitions were seriously diminished at that point. I felt… seen? Hyped up? Horny?
We finished his pack of cigarettes, and talked and talked and talked until it got dark and there was about half of the original group left. I guess people were in a crazy mood because the remaining part of the group wanted to go to a club? Lolll. I wasn’t really in a clubbing mood but I was in the mood to keep talking to Damon.
Damon: Are you going?
Me: (laughing) I’ll go if you go
While everyone went dancing, we sat at the bar of the club, just the two of us and talked for hours on end. It was loud so we would lean in and speak into the other persons ear. It was very hot, and very PG-13. Even with all the tension, we didn’t kiss, didn’t do anything. We just talked.
And it just made me want it even more.
But of course I wasn’t gonna do anything. Especially while we were out with other colleagues.
But it was official: we had out-of-office chemistry.
We stayed friends, kept our relationship friendly and professional, but there was definitely something there.
Summer had come and gone, and at one of the last summer closing events on the lake, I saw him. He was out with a group of friends. I was with my friends. I waved from a distance and he waved back. I left before we really had a chance to talk. But the next day, he texted me.
Damon: It was nice seeing you yesterday!
Me: You too. Damon spotted in the wild. That’s rare! 😂
Damon: 😂 yeah
Damon: I wanted to ask you if you’d want to go for dinner or drinks sometime next week?
My stomach just droppedddddddddddddddddddddddd. Ahhhh!!!!!
finallyfinallyfinally.
Me: Yeah, would love that! Thought you’d never ask haha
Damon: Finally built up the courage! Would you wanna do dinner or drinks?
Me: Mm... let’s do dinner!
We planned to go out for dinner that Thursday. He made reservations at Il Gatto Nero, a famously bougie spot in Como where celebrities like Amal Clooney and Victoria Beckham go.
He picked me up looking very old money, quiet luxury. Tailored coat, slightly tousled hair. I would say... in one word: effortless.
The restaurant was perched on a hill, all candlelight and crisp tablecloths. Our table was on the terrace with a lake view so stunning it really took my breath away. (I am a sucker for a good view, you know that!!)
We both ordered the truffle pasta, and I got duck as my second and he got the steak. We shared a few bites. The food lived up to the hype, but the view was the real draw. It’s an extraordinary date spot. Dangerously romantic.
Damon: I’m happy you gave me a second chance
Me: (laughing) You’re lucky I’m very forgiving
We talked a little about everything- work, travel, future plans. He told me about the full renovation he’d done on his place, and I told him I’d love to do the same once I have the chance (and money). At one point we got into this whole tangent about movie marathons we’d been meaning to do. Lord of the Rings, The Godfather, all the classics. It was easy, fluid. And beneath it all was that humming little awareness: we’re into each other.
Somewhere between the second glass of wine and the last bite of duck, he looked at me and said:
Damon: When I first met you, I thought you were beautiful. But the more I got to know you and work with you, I realized you're also smart and funny. It’s really impressive. And you’re so warm as a person- it’s special to have all of those things.
(Once again -it’s v weird narrating this about myself, but... his words, not mine!)
What do you want me to say? That sh*t works. I’m not made of stone.
It was the perfect lead in to… our first kiss.
And let me tell you-
It was worth the wait.
It was a reallyyy good kiss.
This had been a slowwww burn people. Like 8 months of build up, friendship, and flirting leading up to this moment.
It was slow, sweet, and intentional. And once I kissed him once… I didn’t wanna stop.
I wanted to know more about him — his upbringing, what shaped him, how he got to where he is now. And he actually told me. Not in a heavy, over-sharing way. He was just open.
He’s been through a lot, probably more than most people. But his attitude about it? So good. He was grounded, funny, and kind. Not bitter or jaded.
And honestly, it’s so easy to let life make you bitter. To harden you. But he hadn’t. He was still kind. Still positive. And I really loved that.
I wanted to-
Okay, no. I’m not gonna say it.
But let’s just say: this wasn’t summer of lovers like last year. It was a drought. A California summer. I was burning. And I needed… hydration.
(Yes, I know. That’s fcked up. Let’s move on.*)
Damon: Thank you for coming tonight. I had a really nice time.
Me: Thank you! Everything was amazing.
Damon: Do you want me to drop you off? Or… we could go somewhere for a drink? We also still have half a bottle of wine... we could take it to go.
Me:
I didn’t say anything.
I just kissed him.
The kind of kiss that says: GREEN LIGHT. LET’S GO.
He smiled. A little shy. But this man? Was happy.
You know how in movies people walk into an apartment mid-makeout, clothes flying off?
That’s… just never happened to me. I don’t know how realistic that is. I always enter an apartment like a normal person. Maybe a flirty one. But still- composed.
He unlocked the door, and we walked inside.
Damon: This is my house!
Me: I love it! You did a great job.
It was spacious and well-decorated. Open floor plan, big kitchen and living room, long hallway leading to the bedroom.
And once we were inside… right there in the middle of the living room/kitchen…
It was like all that repressed attraction, all that slow-burn tension, finally had somewhere to go.
And oh- it flooded.
My coworker and I…
Worked.
[ACTION]
We worked on the counter.
We worked on the stool.
He kissed my neck.
Then played it cool.
He took his time.
He knew what to do.
Dropped to his knees
Aced his performance review.
We made out in the hallway.
Walked into his room.
He gave me a look.
I said, “Resume.”
We worked.
We worked.
We worked.
Then - break.
Quick 15.
He handed me a t-shirt.
Said, “You’re a machine.”
We opened the window.
He wanted a smoke.
He lit up a cig.
We laughed. I joked!
He poured me some water.
Then filled up my glass.
Hydration is key
When you're working this fast.
Then he gave me a kiss
And that was the perk.
Of being the office crush
Who knows how to work.
If you’ll allow me a moment of linguistic appreciation- Work really does contain multitudes. Shoutout to RuPaul for this banger.
Damon: I knew it
Me: Knew what?
Damon: That you were gonna be crazy good.
He pressed his forehead against my stomach.
(purr 💅✨girls just wanna have fun)
Me: It takes two to tango
And this would have been a very cool and very sexy way to end the story… but unfortunately… things took a turn.
Let this be your warning that you shouldn’t overwork yourself, ever! It never leads to anything good.
I was having fun. Save a horse, ride your colleague kind of fun.
But… I guess I went a little too buck wild because…. in my ripe age of 29… something happened that I never thought would happen.
I pulled my back.
Yeah, like literally pulled my back and couldn’t move. I went down like the leaning tower of Pisa.
Me: OW
Damon: Are you okay??
Me: Oh my god, noo. Ow.. I… literally can’t even move my neck.
Me: Oh my god…. am I… getting old???
Damon: Can I get you something?
Me: Yeah, pain relievers.
He brought me whatever the European equivalent to Advil is. He said I was more than welcome to spend the night and he could drop me off in the morning. I didn’t have to go anywhere now and could just rest. I said thanks and I took three pills and said I’d just try to sleep it off.
He was very sweet, cuddled as much as he could. I could comfortably stay in one position with my back and neck strictly facing one direction without any pain. So as long as I was in that position, I was good.
Unfortunate turn of events but… all things considered, I had a nice night with my crush so… it could have been worse.
Anyway, the nighttime gives everything a softness. Even me pulling my back was slightly less embarrassing at night, at least compared to in the morning when I had to somehow find a way to get dressed when I could barely stand upright. Bending down? Forget about it. I was like, “Please do not look at me right now.” It was one of the most undignified moments of my life.
My neck and back were basically at a right angle. He had to put my boots on for me !!!
I was so stiff, I was walking like the tin man from the Wizard of Oz. Oh my GOD it was SO EMBARASSING.
With great difficulty I got in his car, and with even greater difficulty I got out of his car when we got to my place. I was thinking “be strong be strong be strong, try to stand up straight as much as you can.”
I didn’t want the last image he saw of me to be… The Hunchback of Notre Dame.
As soon as I got in my building and he couldn’t see me anymore, I hunched over and just let out the most defeated “F******ck.”
I mean, could I even go to work today? I took 3 more Advils, the American good shit, and waited 20 minutes to see how I’d feel. I plopped in bed, in so much pain and just laid there.
I couldn’t get back up.
I called out of work. Occupational hazard.
I texted Damon.
Me: Thank you again for last night, it was an amazing dinner. And thank you for being so gentle with me this morning and the ride.
Damon: It was my pleasure. How are you doing? Feeling better?
Me: No, I called out today. I can’t get out of bed 😂
Damon: Oh noo, I’m so sorry…
Me: Don’t be, it was kinda worth it
That weekend, there was a party on the lake that I refused to miss- body out of alignment or not. I rested up, popped some painkillers (Advil, I'm not Dr. House or whatever), and put on my cutest “I’m totally fine” outfit. My friends and I took a boat over to the house; the sun was shining, I looked great, and yes, I texted Damon a picture: “I’m back standing 😂”
I couldn’t have his last memory of me be a hunched over babushka crawling out of his car.
Anyway, the party was incredible.
It was the best night. Dancing, drinks, everyone in high spirits. I almost forgot how much pain I was in!
Until…
Bam.
Something popped in my knee.
What the fuuuuuu-OOOWWWW
I buckled and nearly fell to the floor. I hopped over to a chair and luckily, the party was hosted by a doctor with other orthopedic surgeons in attendance (because of course).
Their expert advice? “Take a tequila shot and ice it until you can get a scan tomorrow.” I spent the rest of the party dancing on one leg and sometimes getting carried around like an injured MVP.
The next day I went to the hospital and….
I tore my f*cking meniscus. I needed surgery.
I was down bad.
And what the f*ck….
Damon never responded !?!???
Eventually he did, a few days later. Apparently he “dropped his phone” and it broke or whatever. (Sure)
I told him about my knee fiasco and casually dropped some hints- like how I’d be stuck at home and bored for the next few weeks. Maybe we could finally do that movie marathon we talked about on our date. I even threw in a “Ugh, I’m sooo craving ice cream right now if you’re ever in the mood for an ice cream run…”
But he never took the bait.
I know he had a lot going on- he’d been transparent about that during our date- but come on. Watching a movie? Grabbing an ice cream? We’re talking lowest-effort hangouts imaginable. If he really liked me, would’ve jumped at the chance to keep me company. So… I guess he just wasn’t that interested.
…Fine.
But like I said…. they alwaysss come back.
And two months later, I got the moment every girl dreams of.
(Two months later??… Two months?? Baby- the credits already rolled.)
Damon: Hey! Sorry I’ve had a lot going on. I’m finally done with X, Y, & Z. It was kind of a hard time for me, but now I just wanna be surrounded by good energy and good people!
(And me having surgery, not being able to walk, and being in excruciating pain was such a walk in the park...)
Me: Hey! I’m glad you’re good and you got through everything. I have to pass. Honestly, I really liked you and I didn’t feel it was mutual. I’m actually seeing someone now. Good to hear you’re doing better 🤗
Damon: Oh, I’m really happy for you! Just curious why you thought I wasn’t interested?
Me: Well I kept suggesting things we could do together (like get ice cream or watch a movie) and you never took me up on it, and I also didn’t hear from you for a while.
Damon: Sorry…. I had my head buried in my own stuff. I am really happy for you again. Hope we can still be friends?
Me: We’re cool, no worries!
And that was that. No dramatic goodbye, no “what if.” Just a polite full stop. And me, already in a new chapter with someone who didn’t need a second chance.
Anyway, that’s the story of my work crush.
It didn’t work out (lol).
But that’s okay. I moved on.
Sometimes life tries to knock you down… metaphorically, and in my case, with my back and knee… physically.
But, if you’re gonna go down….
Go down with a bang.
*And you can always, always, get back up.
As for the mystery man?
That’s one secret I’ll never tell.
You know you love me.
XOXO,
Gossip girl
Dating 101 Key Take Aways:
1) They always come back. Just make sure you’re not still waiting when they do. Keep it moving. If you slept on me, stay asleep!
2) Getting knocked down by life is inevitable. Might as well be having fun. If you’re gonna go down, go down with a bang.
